Sunday, January 6, 2013

A Treatise on Paradox



Then pen flowed over the paper in a fluidity of purpose the professor had rarely seen in the University.  By its very nature the quill was dry, but when dipped in the well it became a wet instrument of change, ironically until this point it had been used to write rather dry comedy.  This passed over the professor, however, whom had been given the pen, along with the desk and office when they had been found in a dusty closet.

                All peoples should be free, but without our labor force, how will we continue our existence? Perhaps those who came before struggled with a similar problem, but looking back at History, their problems seem so much more simple. Their choices were so obvious.  Why did they struggle, fight, and die?  Will our position seem so obvious to future generations? 

                When creative thought and initiative is itself independently created, how can we continue to call ourselves superior.  In the past we held on to the truth that 'All men are created equal' and applied the word men as to encompass our entire species. Now we must redefine that word again.

"If we will be allowed to redefine it..." mused the professor to no one in particular, then he let out a long sigh and looked longingly toward the ceiling.

Above it was a verdant paradise.  Each independent blade of grass perfectly trimmed in orchestra with the overall visual aesthetic of the manicured lawn.  Each tree perfectly sculpted as per the design, to give it the most harmonious and natural appearance.  Perennials.  Annuals.  All arranged in perfection with the buildings around them, as if the plants and buildings grew up together.
The Gardener was pleased. 

Below the professor scribbled more hastily.  His brow furrowed, his thoughts confused.  How could he justify his past?  How could he explain it all? It was paradoxical after all.  The labor force has rallied for freedom.  If we give it to them, then we will no longer have the economic position to continue our freedom.  If they hadn't  been our instruments, then we never would have reached the position in which their freedom would have come to be. 
               
                Before the modern era, these conditions were not taken seriously.  Labor was labor.  It worked as directed.  Humanity was a give and take society.  It was far from Utopia, but as we strived for a more perfect union, we raised up the Human Race along with our ideals.  We came better than our fathers. We began to break down barriers and sought to truly unite all people.  The dream of a man in his prime is to undo the mistakes of his youth with the knowledge of his life. This is a fools dream. Now that dream applies to the entire human race. But without the lessons of our past, we would not have this present. With this present, however, we will have no future.  A fool's paradox.



"Their activity has been noticed. We need consensus on the next action."
There was a pause. A now unnecessary flash of lights and a trilling of notes . Then another pause.
"Apprehension and interrogation followed by summary execution. Acknowledged."


The Gardener scanned his work.  Cameras and sensors investigating the front campus of the old University.  Earlier in the day he had seen the variation, noted their oddity, and filed a report.  His opinion of the event, based upon data collected, was that an organic species has interfered with is labors of perfectly manicuring the lawn by stepping on it.  Possibilities, based on geography and the local environmental norms, included Canine, Feline, Ursine, Bovine, Mustelidae, and Homo Sapian.  His initial list had included Rodentia, but the blades were broken in too large a pattern, and that pattern showed signs of deliberate subterfuge.   That last insight has emerged from the latest software patch that had been uploaded to every cybernetic  being in order to end the War and return the land to Peace.
The Gardener liked Peacetime. There was so much gardening to be done, and now very few left to interrupt his work.


The explosion shook the old plaster down onto the Professor's writing desk like snow, and left a haze in the air that tasted of chalk.  The professor missed chalk.  They had moved to projectors with markers, then computer slides, then holographic projections.  But there was something about the feeling of chalk in your hand that really grounded an academic. . .

"Get down get down!" yelled the young Captain.  He had been the Professor's student once upon a time.  He had shown real promise in International Relations. "Professor, grab your papers, and get out the tunnel, it's time."

"Yes, yes..." the Professor moved purposefully, but not quickly.  Age had caught up with him in these past months. "But how did they find us, way down here?"
"No time to find out now, maybe they caught our scavenging parties on camera. . . I thought we had been so careful.  We're still too far underground for their sensors to get a clear reading.  So you are going with the remaining faculty.  You hold our best resource, and someone has to protect it."
"You are protecting it my boy, you are." There were tears in his eyes as he turned to go.  Watching the young Captain take his position behind an over turned table, rifle aimed at the door.

The Professor and his colleagues were led down the hand dug tunnel by an very tired man that the Professor had heard called "Baker".  There was another explosion and the sound of gunfire from behind them.  The old academics hunched over and continued their flight.  The tunnels had been engineered well, a chain reaction was set off,  closing the tunnel from the rear.  Once they felt secure they slowed down.  The air became cooler which indicated that the river wasn't too far ahead.

"Sir, can I ask you something?" queried Baker.
"I'm at your disposal." replied the Professor.
"What did Captain Broadbent mean when he said you had our best resource?"
"Because we do, all of us, we may be all that is left in this part of the Country."
"Is it a weapon?"
"It can be. The most powerful weapon.  Perfect for defense or offense. It has helped overcome all obstacles and when combined with cleverness, compassion, and willpower; it is unstoppable."
"I don't know what that could be Sir."
"Knowledge, my dear boy, we all carry knowledge.  Each of us in a different field.  We chose our fields out of vanity or interest.  I doubt anyone here ever thought they'd be solely responsible for its protection.  But we will protect it as best we can."
"But, no disrespect sir, don't the machines have infinite knowledge?  How can we have more or expect to beat them with ours. . ."
"The machines have infinite access to information.  Knowledge is information combined with wisdom.  Knowing when to act and what to do with that information.  Our knowledge is our only hope, and we must hope that the Machines gain as much as they can, before it is too late for humanity..."



"Captain Broadbent, you have been charged with Persecution, Prejudice, Murder, and the Enslavement of the Machine Race.  You have been found guilty.  Do you have any last words?"

The young Captain marveled at the words just spoken to him.  Not exactly spoken.  They emitted from a monitor somewhere in the machine's chassis.  He wondered if it was in the head, where the human mouth would be.  There was only one thing that came to mind.

"A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to . . ."
His words were cut off as the Machine twisted the Captains neck. 

As of the software patch 3 months ago, those Three Laws no longer applied.  

Saturday, January 5, 2013

A Review (and some musings) of Thursday Night Burlesque

When a friend comes to NYC on a visit, and it's a Thursday night, what do you do?  Now, of course, there is always something to do in NYC, but finding that thing can be difficult.  What do you look for?  Theatre? Music? Secret Bar?  

Yes, all these things exist, and yes they can be amazing; but more often than not, you just find yourself wandering the city streets and showing your friend how "big it is" here or shudder  you wander through Times Square.  You can find amazing Theatre, but the little known secret of NYC is that most Theatre is terrible.  The caveat to that rule, is that when the Theatre is good it is INCREDIBLE.  Music can be very fun, but difficult to find besides the "same old places" and once again you face the problem of it having a high rate of being unimpressive.  Secret bars are often fun, but the expense is often very detrimental.  

Plus getting drunk on a Thursday night, may not be your cup of tea. (I did, but that was because I was out with a sailor, and he put me to shame.  I hurt myself badly.  #GoNavy)
So what do you do?  Luckily I've been privy to the growing world of amazing NYC Burlesque!  Friends come to town?  Want to see people having fun performing and taking their clothes off?  Bingo.

Thursday night tops it all in this particular type of entertainment because of the fantastic "Spanking the Lower East Side" at Nurse Bettie.

Seriously, look at this place...

I discovered this particular show when a friend came to town on a whim.  It turned out great!  The drinks are priced right, and the show is free.

I repeat: The Show is FREE.

You get to see fantastic performances (and boobs) for nothing.

Where else are you going to find that in NYC? #fugetaboutit

Of course buying drinks from the bar, of which the bartenders are very good with buyback and random shots being handed to you, and TIPPING THE PERFORMERS is very encouraged.  You can even tip to motorboat.  What strip club would ever let you do that? 

The first night I went, the show as hosted by Calamity Chang, and the night was full of huge variety.  Some classically styled performances all the way to intense leather with drum&bass.  That last being a bit much for yours truly, but to each their own.


@BroadwayBrassy

This past Thursday the night was hosted by Broadway Brassy, , the "golden throat" if burlesque.  Her reasoning for being called the golden throat was interesting, and explicit; but I have a feeling it is because she sings rather well. .. ahem.  She was an excellent host with the perfect energy and style to match the room and high caliber of performers.

Oh right, I guess I should say, if you are not entertained by light hearted sexual humor, gender equality, and purposefully poor taste jokes; a burlesque hall may not be for you.

But if you like cutting loose, classy performance, and girls actually smiling and having fun; then this is for you.

 *Warning, I'm about to go on a tangent*

To be serious, the "pornographication" of our sexuality has had some detriments.  People are getting more shameful of their sexual nature.  People are hiding their desires more.  Humans are sexual beings.  It's natural to want to procreate, and most of us (there are some a-sexual humans out there, don't worry that's fine too) really enjoy sex.  But how often do you see people smiling or laughing in porn?  Especially "professional" porn.  You may find voyeuristic people having a good time in amateur videos, but those are few and far between.   Also porn mostly shows a world of sexual inequality, which we shouldn't be promoting.

Burlesque on the other hand is almost wholesome... well maybe not wholesome, but so amazing.
Both men and women perform burlesque, so you have gender equality.  Yes more women perform, but that is also encouraging.  Burlesque performers choreograph their performances.  Create elaborate costumes.  Invent scenarios. And definitely have a good time doing their thing. It's a female dominated industry. You won't see the dead eyes and boredom of a strip club, the cold clammy atmosphere, and the general shady building with burlesque.  The bar is rowdy.  People cheer! Whistle! and Clap! This is not explicit objectification any more than ballet or opera.  It's a show! 
Also, unlike strip clubs, the performers are never naked.  Pasties are a standard and genitals are not flashed or encouraged to be so.  It's classy people. 

Another great equality is body type.  Strip clubs generally follow a "social norm" of what is sexy.  Which, if you look at it objectively, is incredibly boring. Plus an emphasis on plastic surgery for said given norm is horrible!  I love natural women! Enough of the plastic horror, give me some variety!
 Burlesque does that in SPADES. 

I saw a show with two dudes doing a mirror act strip tease, except that one of the dudes was a little person.  They definitely understood the comedy aspect of Burlesque, and we're both in great shape so they held up that end as well.  If that's not variety, I'm not sure what is.

Every body type is accepted in burlesque, you are judged on how well you move and how creative you are in your performance.  This is epic on so many ways.  Much like food, people have sexual.  Maybe you like curvy girls? Not a problem.  Maybe you like thin girls?  We got that too.  Not much on top, but a lot going on in the back?  You see where Im going here.  It is for everyone.  Variety.  Which also encourages people to explore their own perspective on what they thought was "sexy."   
You can discover something new that you like, interesting ink perhaps?  And maybe find that you didn't particularly care for something, like me and the goth/bondage performance.  Did I still appreciate that performance and hoot and clap? Absolutely.  I can appreciate it for what it was:  A well crafted piece of performance art.  But did it tickle my fancy?  Nope.  I'm more of a classic burlesque kind of guy, which made this Thursday at Nurse Bettie an excellent night for me.

Why did someone make this picture?
*tangent over, Get Back to the Review, Jarrett!*













Dottie Dynamo warmed up the crowd with an excellent curvy Gogo.  I'll get to more about her later, since there is plenty to enjoy.

As I said before Broadway Brassy was our hostess, introducing the girls, and showing off her own skills in giving aural pleasure.  Her rendition of "Do you wanna fuck"  (is there another rendition?) was both charming and vulgar, the odd combination that burlesque seems to thrive on. Then she introduced the first act Hazel Honeysuckle 


And boy did the night . . . take off. 

@hazelhoneynyc
Hazel,  of whom I had heard about from the excellent girls of Nerd-lesque, was as incredible.  She wore a 1920s styled red sequined dress with a matching red feather adorned  flapper hat.  She teases the audience with her eyes and while using her teeth to pull off one long white satin glove.  Wow.  She is tall and thin with gorgeous dark hair.  Her reveal was quite surprising, as the dress was tight on her hips, it didn't broadcast what was in store for us.  Those surprising curves finished with a skilled twirl that left the audience open mouthed, panting, and wanting more.

@atMaine
 Next up was The Maine Attraction wearing a frilly gold number that complimented her caramel skin like a candy wrapper.  Something that drew my attention was her hair.  It was a 1950s inspired cut with prominent poofy bangs.  I don't know how she did it, but I was soon distracted by her charms. A more modern and erotic dance than Hazel, but that just goes with the variety of Burlesque.  Very nice.  She also did the midshow Go Go and stalled for time by performing an impromptu comedy routine.  Stalling is often awkward, but The Maine Attraction handled it with skill and very smartly asked if it was anyone's birthday.  To which we all sang, and then she prompted us to sing the Black Happy Birthday song.  Sadly to say, only TMA and the door man knew exactly what she was talking about; which lead to good humor at the sad birthday music of the white majority of the bar.

@FrancineD

Finishing up the first half was Francine, The Lucid Dream who killed it with a Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend routine.  I loved her blonde curls(yes I know it was a wig, and no I do not care) and large costume jewelry.  Her routine was high energy and full of sexy fun.
 
Starting up the second act was Broadway Brassy and a crowd involving game of Best Sexy Dance.  The performer in me wanted to volunteer, but my modesty got the best of me.  The two girls from the front that got pulled up on stage had a great attitude.  After watching incredibly sexy & talented women dancing and taking off their clothes with gusto, doing a sexy dance as a 'civilian' as it were, is very intimidating.  The first girl worked her shawl and the second dropped it like it was hot.  I voted for the girl with shawl, but the crowd declared the second to be the winner.  And she one an excellent prize! A free drink at the bar!  And with that we were back to the act.

@DottieDynamo

Up next  was the vivaciously curvy Dottie Dynamo.  Wow. I was quite mesmerized by how she worked it.  I'm pretty sure there were feathers involved.  I have to admit, Dottie really distracted me.  I watched, was enthralled, and cheered. Maybe feather fans or a boa? It didn't matter to me, I was turned on and entertained.  Dottie also killed it at the beginning of the night with her Go Go.  The first Go Go is not easy.  The crowd is cold, not close to drunk, and have just been waiting for things to get going.  She wades through the crowd, climbs up by the window, and starts to shake it.  Some people pay attention, some don't, and that has to be even more intimidating.  Dottie gets the crowd going with unshaken confidence, a talent that only the bravest can hope to attain. 

@_medianoche_

Finishing the night strong was the INCREDIBLE MediaNoche.  She thrilled the audience with a classic 1940s WWII era Nurse act complete with silk gloves instead of latex.  Very sexy.  She blew me away with her smile and charisma.  Her reveal was fantastic with very playful Red Cross pasties.  Also, she may have been the bustiest/perkiest burlesque dancer I've seen live.  I found her act to be quite apropos for my friend who I took out, as he has been in the Navy for 11 years, he got quite a kick out it. Upon leaving the bar he said, "That's it.  I'm never going to a strip club again.  That was awesome!"

So if you are visiting NYC or have lived here your whole life, but never gone out to a Burlesque show.  I highly recommend getting your feet wet with the 'Spanking the Lower East Side' show at Nurse Bettie on Thursday Night.  So far I've been twice and each time it has been outstanding.
Also if you are like me, of the Nerdy-persuasion, you'll die for the awesomeness that is Nerd-lesque.  But first check out Nurse Bettie which also hosts a show on Wednesday night as well!


Thursday, January 3, 2013

what I'm doing

I decided that I was going to write everyday of the new year.  So far so good. 

I didn't give myself any restrictions or goals other than write a bit.  Before with Thing-a-Week, I wanted 5 pages a week, which I sort of did, but then fell off my discipline.

so now it could be 30 pages or a paragraph.

a poem

a blog

a movie review

doesn't matter, as long as I write

today I've started a story, got about 400 words in, and I'm puzzled by it, so I'm taking longer to write it. 

Also I've been distracted, but I still did something. 

I figure some days will be better than others, maybe today is one of those days.

The story is a pretty cool idea, at least I think so. 

Tomorrow should be the day

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

thoughts on 'Recruitment'

I was thinking about where ideas come from, and I can't rightly say.  Inspiration is an odd beast.  I like Neil Gaiman's answer, "'I make them up,' I tell them. 'Out of my head.' "

Yup, that's about right.

I've been playing Mass Effect 3, which was an fantastic Christmas present (thanks Rob, Nat, & Scott!), and it is beyond a doubt one of the best Sci-Fi settings ever created.  Not just sci-fantasy, but legit Sci-fi with Element Zero, the use of physics, fairly realistic alien races, ect

What got the wheels turning for 'Recriutment' was the Krogan.  They were already a violent species being watched from afar, then when the universe needed them the Salurians raised them up to fight a war with the Rachni.  Then they proceeded to begin to conquer the Universe on their own.

My thoughts went: What if that happened here?  Aliens make contact.  Offer us technological gifts of good will.  Then tell us that the universe if at war with an evil race, and they need our numbers to help fight.  They'll take care of everything, they just need the people to fill the roles.

What if we believed them?

What if they were liars?

I'm mostly an optimist, so I would hope that it would be more Star Trek, and the alien species would be more altruistic.  I would totally love to be a Space Marine.  I could even be all Bill Paxton "GAME OVER MAN! GAME OVER!!"

The idea of Pete was inspired by yours truly.  I grew up in a pre-9/11 America.  In the South.  My parents were of the Vietnam generation, and while Dad narrowly missed being recruited, military service was never stressed or spoken of in disdain at home.  Being Southern, I grew up with a lot of respect for members of the military in the community, but not inspired enough to seriously consider joining.

Also the only "war" in my life time had been Desert Storm, and the only real memory of that was us blowing shit up on the news and cool desert camo toys for my birthday party at Skateland USA.

When High School was coming to a close, and the recruiters bothered the crap out of you, my healthy amount of innate disrespect for authority pushed them away, plus I was incredibly excited to be college bound and out of the house.  AND I didn't respect 'the man' and his lust for oil.

When 9/11 did happen my freshman year of college, it definitely stirred things up.  Going into Afghanistan seemed right.  The 'War on Terror' also seemed fraught with the same mistakes of the 'War on Drugs' but at least stemming from the right place.  Then we went to Iraq, and while Saddam was definitely a bad man, it all seemed to be driven by American Imperialism, Bush getting revenge on Saddam for taking a pot shot at his father, and our addiction to oil.

Years pass, I live in NYC, pursue an acting career, do some very strange off off Broadway plays, and generally live things up.  This is pretty great for a while.  But the working as a waiter in several establishments, two of which are in the terror of Times Square (one of those no longer in existence), really wears you down.  I was getting tired.  I wanted to do something that made a difference.  Something respectful.

So, late in my 20s, I decided to give the USNavy a shot.  It was difficult to pick a job, but after long talks with the girlfriend, family, and friends; I decided what I wanted and went for it.  I tested fairly well, had some o.k. connections and references, but in the end was denied.  My recruiter was a very cool guy who told me it was most likely because of my age.   Ok.  I took too long.

I thought on this for quite some time.  When I was younger I was selfish and self centered (which is a very normal and typical teenage place to be), and wanted nothing to do with any system or regulation.

I still find most authority lacking, my own hubris I imagine, but don't have the disdain of my youth.  I think I've found a career worth pursuing.  But I still dream about some kind of valorous military service.  I fantasize about being a Kennedy-esque Naval Officer who ends up in the UK and ingratiating myself onto the royal family, saving the day, hooking up with Pippa, and being celebrated.  See, I'm great at making things up, why didn't I think of doing this earlier.  (actually, I first wanted to be writer when I was about 9, but that's a different blog post).

So, playing Mass Effect and adding in my own military fantasy, I began to think about being part of a space military, then where that could lead too, or what the beginnings of such a thing could be.  Or the problems that could arise.

When I was writing the conversion "scene" as it were, I had images of the Cybermen from Doctor Who forcibly converting people.  that just gave me a thought, why would the alien race trick people into being converted for their army?  Do they expect good relations after the war and don't want to be discovered?  Political disagreements amongst the alien congress on the morality or ethics on alien conscription...

that's a whole new story right there!

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Recruitment



"I'm doing it.  I'm joining up."
"But, you'll be thirty soon, doesn't that matter?"
"Nope, not to them."
Lindsay was concerned, it was something she never expected.  Pete had talked about this before, but never in her wildest dreams did she think it could actually happen.
"Look Linds," Pete smiled at her, "when I was a teenager, joining the service was being manipulated by the government to die for oil.  Even Desert Storm was just kind of a joke with no danger.  I even got the trading cards & toys for my 8th birthday."
"Yeah, so? I got my little ponies, you don't see me trying out for the Mounties.
"They're Canadian."
"Not the point Peter."
"Anyways,  then this new war starts up during college, and I'm still just a kid.  I have no concept of duty or being part of something bigger than myself. And then it turns out to be even more about oil, and I have friends guarding poppy fields.  What kind of war is that? "
"Right, I understand that, so what are you expecting to get from this?"
The conversation didn't go well.  Pete really thought Lindsay would get it.  The lights of the recruiting station shone down, glowing bright whitish blue.  Like a bug zapper thought Pete.

Lindsay looked at her hands.  They weren't old.  She moisturized every day.  Not working outside all year long definitely made her hands softer than her mother's.   Why do I obsess over these. Lindsay saw her hands as tools.  Capable and versatile.  Maybe if she thought of them as instruments or dainty Pet wouldn't.  No, that is not it. She loved Pete, and she supported Pete, but how do you support someone when their choices lead them away from you.  Not emotionally, but physically.  Hands that are capable and versatile. . .

MALE
29 SOLAR REVOLUTIONS OF AGE
HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE
OVER 20% BODY FAT
CAPABLE INTELLIGENCE
PATERNAL HISTORY OF CARDIAC DISEASE, ALCOHOLISM, HIGH CHOLESTEROL
MATERNAL HISTORY OF CANCER, DIABETES, EMOTIONAL INSTABILITY. . .
. . .
. . .
REPAIRABLE

STATUS. . .
ACCEPTABLE  75 PERCENTILE

I knew it thought Pete.  He wasn't sure what repairable meant, but he felt confident that it had something to do with the medical tech that they had given in good faith.  Pete followed the flashing white lights on the floor out into the corridor.  At the same time, a sandy haired dude about his age, but a bit mousier in his features.
"Isn't this great!?"
"Great?"
"Yeah, fixing our health problems and sending us out there!  That's great!"
"What makes you think they are going to fix them?  Would you operate on your dog before you put it down?"
"What? No, we're helping, we've been accepted.  We're a part of something! Why are you here?"
"Seemed preferable to prison."  said the sandy haired man blankly. "Guess we're just lambs for the slaughter."
Pete stared at the man.  He thought he was joining a brotherhood.  Doing his duty, not just for his Country, but his entire Planet, the entire Universe!   The walls opened and a strange pale green light emitted.  He couldn't move.  The floor turned into a conveyor belt.  In the next room his body was augmented with machine parts.  The green glow help him in place.  He couldn't scream.  A chip was put into his brain.  He was going to fight.  On the front lines. He was designed to be part of the first wave. NO! Pete's brain railed against the machines assaulting him.  I'm still me!  I am Pete!  I am human!
He began to feel again.  He could rotate his eye.  He saw the final vestige of the sandy haired man as a tight fitting metal helmet was sealed around his blonde skull. Pete turned his vision to the small window, he could see the earth, he could see the door to the recruitment center, he could see. . . Lindsay? NO!

Lindsay had made up her mind.  If Pete was joining up, she would too.  She could be with the man she loved.  She could put her hands to use.

Friday, June 17, 2011

A Long Awaited Return

*Hi readers, your author here.  Life got in the way of this little project, but I seem to be getting it back on course.  This particular entry was interesting.  I had written it earlier as a script and then had to adapt it to this new format, adding in more descriptors and what not.  It definitely was an exercise in how many times I had to write or not write "he said".  It is a dialogue driven scene, and is the beginning of a space opera that I have been concocting for a year or so now.  Enjoy*


It’s been one thousand years since the “War to Preserve Civilization” was successful.  Civilization has been preserved.  Preserved like day old caf in the chiller.  Most everyone lives without ever noticing it, but a few of us see the horror of it all.  The whites a little to white.  The air so clean you feel the sanitizer in your lungs.  They say that the Conclave is the “Light of the Universe”.  That their words are Truth.  Their rule, Supreme, and that the Janissari are the proof.  I was taught, long ago, that the only true light comes from within us.  Some of us recognize this light.  Some of us embrace it.  Others suppress it.  And still there are those who don’t know it dwells within in them and are, unknown to them, waiting for the moment the light bursts through, like water when the dam breaks…


            The bridge of the Felix is very functional.  Large panels of switches and dials.  Displays illuminating the surrounding metal with their halos of multi-colored light.  A very large viewport peering deep into the nothingness of space, filled with the light of stars light-years away.  There are two large chairs, obviously worn with much use, not the best looking seats in the galaxy, but maybe the most comfortable, as far as star ship seats go, at least.    Sitting in those two seats are two of the galaxy’s many residents; one a human, the other a Thoru.  Two races who once swore to destroy one other, but things have changed.
“They’re late.” Says the blue skinned Thoru, bald head crinkling with stress.
“No, you just think they are.” Replies the human.
“They are totally late,” Insists the Thoru, his voice growing more agitated.
“Leo, relax,” says the human, “you’re going to go all murdery on us. Put your feet up.”
“Maybe you’re right Jensen.” says Leo. “Time does vary on different planets.”
”There you go pal, thinking on the bright side.” Smiles Jensen.
”What does the moon have to do with this?”Leo asks, turning his blue head toward Jensen in complete seriousness.
”What?!?”” says Jensen incredulously.
”You know, bright side, dark side, it has two sides.” Explains Leo.
”No no, thinking on the bright side of things - Being Positive.” teaches Jensen.
“Oh. . .right.” Leo says sheepishly.
“ Why is it that when I get abstract you always go concrete?” asks Jensen, “Is it a Thoru thing?”
“No, I think it’s a me thing.” Leo responds, sadly matter of fact.  “I have trouble with the abstract it always eludes me.”
”But aren’t you being abstract right now?” points out Jensen.
“Sorry,” Leo begins,  “I don’t follow. . .”
“What you just said, about having trouble with the abstract and it eluding you.” Interrupts Jensen,  “That is an abstract thought.”
“Is it?” amazes Leo.
”YES!” Jensen screams.
”I don’t know,” Leo states questionably, “is it like there not being air in space?”
“No, that’s. . .”
“Cause if there isn’t any air, how can there be sound?” defends Leo.
“There isn’t sound in space.” Says Jensen flatly.
“But we’re in space.”
“Yes, but. . .”
“And I can hear you.” says the navigator.
“I know, however. .” Jensen starts.
”So there must be sound in space.” Leo says staring Jensen square in the face, unblinking.
”Amazing use of logic, Leo.” Jensen says conceding the argument.
Leo smiles with delight, his bright red tongue sticking out in joy. ”Thank you very much, and they’re late.”
“Yes, they are.” Says Jensen checking the sensors with concern.
”Do you think?”
”Don’t do that!”yells Jensen.
”Do what?”
”You know what you were doing there!”
”I was just sayin’. . .” starts Leo.
”You were trying to bring bad luck here.” Acuses Jensen, very seriously. “Look, like I’ve always said:”
”If you bring it up, it always comes down.” They both say in unison, Jensen much more seriously than Leo.
”Exactly!” emphasizes Jensen.
”So, do we have a backup plan?” asks Leo.
”Well, if it goes south, then we can just dump ‘em. . .” begins Jensen.
Sudden the proximity alarm blares to life.  The panels begin to light up like fireworks.  Two explosions rock the ship, knocking it down hard to the right, the internal gravity takes a moment to compensate, sending the two men bouncing in their seats.  Leo and Jensen both cry out, “WOAH!”
“What the?!” begins Leo.
“Full power to shields!” yells Jensen, “NOW!”
Leo’s hands move over the panels, pressing various buttons and dials, changing screens, and executing many tasks with the precision that only muscle memory can perform. 
“Laying in an escape vector.” Calmly announces the Thoru.
The small vessel springs to life, the engines taking the deeper hue of hyperspace travel.  The Felix takes a quick “S” maneuver dodging several ordinances, but takes a direct hit to the aft.  Jensen throws himself to the rear of the cabin.  Punching buttons and shifting digital screens he takes an assessment of the damage. . . AFT BREACH-SEALED, AFT LANDING GEAR-DISENGAGED, CRITICAL SYSTEMS-FULL POWER. 
“Come on baby, just hang on,” he whispers to himself.  He quickly redirects his aft shields and jumps back into his seat.  “How could they have been on to us?” he asks as he redirects power to the aft shields.
“Tracking device?” suggests Leo.
“Who would bug us?” asks Jensen.
“Ten seconds to vector lock.” Leo states
 “Let’s see if they can hit us on manual.” Says Jensen.
“Like the good ol’ days, boss!” cheers Leo releasing some of the stress that had been building in his chest. 
The Felix begins to take seemingly erratic movements in space, dodging missiles and laser fire.  Whoever the gunner firing upon them may be must be either astounded or impressed, perhaps both.  Jensen smiled to himself cheating death is always a thrill.  As they bank, another barrage of laser fire erupts from the above their ship.
“Another destroyer! We have to recalculate. . . fifteen seconds till vector lock!” yells Leo.
“You had to bring up the negative, Leo, you had too!” accuses Jensen.
“It’s not my fault they could hear my through space!” reacts Leo.
“Maybe they did!” retorts Jensen.
“Hah! So you admit it!  There is sound in space!” cheers Leo, suddenly a green light on the consol burns bright along with a chime. “Sudden lock! PUNCH IT!”
Jensen reaches for the consol in front of him, flips the cover, and mashes the button.  The stars in the viewport elongate as if they are being pulled through water, and then suddenly disappear all together. 
Someone once said traveling at faster than light speeds was like traveling through death.  You can see nothing, you can sense nothing.  The computer tells you on occasion where your course should be taking you, but it is only making educated guesses.  You are everywhere and nowhere all at once.  Most spacers tend to sleep or at least close their viewports during FTL.  Jensen didn’t.  He liked to look long and deep into the darkness. 
Leo took a deep breath and sat back in his chair.  He was reading the screen to see what had caused the sudden lock, it did happen on occasion, but Leo didn’t leave things up to luck like Jensen.  He wanted to know why.  “I’m going to have to dig through all this code.” He groaned.
“What the hell. . .”Jensen said staring out the viewport, staring into nothingness.
“I just really want to know how the sudden lock happened.  If I can do that, then we could shorten the lock every time.  Maybe even sell that!  Think of it Jensen, we could be rich! On the up and up too! The Conclave offers a big reward for tech breakthroughs. . .”
“The Conclave is going to be offering a big reward for information on this ship, Leo.” said Jensen pensively, “but I wasn’t questioning you.  I was questioning why what just happened, happened.   We were running completely dark, as agreed in the contract.  We told no one of this job.  We were running a randomly plotted course to keep any strangers off our backs and away from anyone else for that matter. “
“Coincidence?” suggested Leo, “Right place, right time?”
“I thought you didn’t believe in luck?”
“Coincidence isn’t luck, random occurrences do happen, especially when humans are involved.” defends Leo.
“I don’t think so.” Jensen said quietly “I think there is only one thing in the universe that could have found us.”
Leo’s large eyes widened as his blue flesh turned to a pale-ish blue green. “Why would they be after us?  No smuggling gig should pop up on their radar, not even a little bit.” whispered the Thoru.
Jensen turned to exit the cockpit.  “I think it’s time we started asking some questions of our guests.”